Mom Versus Career

Finding the balance between being a competent decision-maker, a desirable spouse, and a kick-ass mom.

“The Grass is Always Greener” Syndrome August 8, 2011

Do you ever feel out of place? As if you belong somewhere else?

I do.

I think we all feel that way at some point in our lives.

In the eight years I’ve been married, I’ve moved five times. I loathe moving, so I’m not sure why I agreed to move each time the opportunity presented itself. Our move to northern Minnesota was born out of necessity, but it wasn’t an easy decision.

I think the allure of moving somewhere new clouds our judgement. It’s “The Grass is Always Greener” syndrome. We convince ourselves that moving to a new apartment, city, state, etc. will ‘fix’ everything, whatever it is. I’m not unhappy with my life as it is, but I am restless. There are several factors contributing to my restlessness, but I know the main reason is that I try to convince myself that my life will be better, everything will fall into place, if I can just get to ____. Fill in the blank.

It’s a lie we try to convince ourselves is true. Any problems we have in our lives, unless directly related to our locations, will be packed up along with our clothes, dishes, furniture, plastic squirrels, and antique typewriters and move right along with us to our new homes. My hang-ups at work? They are mine. My struggle with perfectionism? It comes with me, too.

Once we realize that all of those ‘problems’ will stay with us, moving loses its appeal.

The key is to realize that we, you and me, are the common denomenators and that we can’t solve our problems by running away from them. Instead we must face them head on and declare our intentions to get rid of them. Some do this by planning. Others seek council from friends, relatives and/or professionals. All are great choices because they require action on our part.

A wise man, Jon Acuff, once said, “The dream you never act on, fails 100% of the time.” This can also apply to solving the problems, hang-ups, and hurts in our lives. If we never do anything to change our situations, our situations will never change.

If you want to live a better life, do something about it. Don’t wait passively for an opportunity to present itself. Yes, it’s hard. But you’re worth the effort!

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